Your dads are SO hot
by White Dog 2
Summary: Teen Sano and Chi walk in on Kai and Tyson making sweet, sweet love. Trauma, anyone?


**A/N:** Teenage Sano and Chi walk in on Tyson and Kai making love. And as you can guess, the effect of the sight is a tad different on Sano as on us readers… lol

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything

**Warning:** Yaoi, SanoChi, Tyka

Sano jumped out of the school bus and ran up to the front door of the Kon dojo. He knocked on the door, his signature one-four-one, and rang the doorbell. He waited, tapping his foot restlessly, but nobody answered. Glancing around, he knelt and took a spare key from under the rug. Getting up, he glanced around again to make sure the old neighbourhood ladies weren't watching, and opened the lock. He put the key on the small desk.

"Honey, I'm home!" he yelled jokingly, but the house was silent. Sano kicked his sneakers off and dropped his backpack and denim jacket on the floor, walking in the kitchen. Empty. He opened the fridge (telling himself it was just curiosity), saw a half-eaten chocolate bar, shrugged and ate it. He ran to the stairs and leaped them up, three at a time. Sano halted at Chi's door and listened. Nothing. He knocked. Still nothing. He was really running out of patience.

Sano opened the door and saw Chi lying on his bed. The older boy was facing the wall, motionless and breathing evenly. Books, clothes, files, CDs, shoes, candy wrappers and other stuff lay scattered across the room. Sano grinned every time he saw Chi's room; it reminded him he didn't have the messiest room in the universe, like dad claimed. He closed the door quietly and neared the bed. Chi sighed and rolled on his back, causing the Japanese's heart to miss a beat.

The Neko-Jin was so stunning it dissipated Sano's speech every time he saw him. At least for a few seconds. Despite of the pink hair, there was nothing feminine about the older boy. He was Rei with pink, braidless hair, a narrow T-shirt and jeans hugging his tall, lean body. He had thrown his studded belt on the floor before lying down. Sano's gaze flicked from the purple nail polish to the earring. He sighed hopelessly; Chi was so… effortlessly sensual.

"You gonna stare at me all day?"

"AAAAH!" Sano's heart nearly jumped out of his throat, and he fell down. Golden eyes opened, amused. Sano glared up at his oldest friend, flushed with embarrassment. The Chinese boy stretched and hooked his arm under his neck, watching Sano climb into bed.

"How did the pop quiz go?" Sano asked, trying to avert the attention from his creepy behaviour. Chi smiled softly, shrugging.

"Ok," he said.

"You tired?" the dark-haired boy asked. Chi reached his hands above his head, pressing the end board of his bed, shivering slightly.

"Mhh. It's the stress," he yawned. Sano propped his head with his elbow, palm against cheek. He smiled at Chi, a bit flustered.

"Where's your mom?" he asked. Chi frowned thoughtfully.

"I'm pretty sure she's home," he said. Sano puckered his lips absentmindedly.

"Didn't open. I tried to find her, but she's not downstairs."

"Probably went to the store," the pink-haired teen mused. Sano's brows rose meaningfully, and he leaned closer.

"You don't say?" he murmured suggestively, making the older boy blush ever so slightly. Sano put his hand on Chi's chest, leaning his chin down. The hinting tone had disappeared abruptly.

"I wish we were in the same class," he sighed, "I hate waiting for you after school." Chi smiled wryly, looking up at the ceiling.

"What about days like these?" he asked. Sano gave him a pointed look.

"Apparently it's no problem for you to sleep the time away," he muttered.

"Look who's talking."

"Meanie." Chi glanced at the younger boy.

"What _are_ you doing here? Didn't you drop off your bag at home?" Sano rolled his eyes.

"Like you forgot! I'm staying over this weekend, duh!" Pink brows furrowed in confusion. Sano's eyes widened.

"Come on, don't you remember? It's anniversary weekend!" he said. Chi blinked and blushed.

"Oh, right," he muttered, "Yeah, you don't wanna step foot into that house this weekend…" Sano nodded darkly. Tyson and Kai were still like newlyweds, at least when it came to occasions like these. It was like the passion between them hadn't faded a bit during the years, much to Sano's discomfort. He didn't have to ask to know what would be going on under the Hiwatari roof for the next two days. Sano shook his head, trying to rid the image from his mind.

"Not that they're unpleasant to the eye," Chi reasoned a tad hesitantly, "You _do_ have the top ranking dads on the school bathroom's DILF list." Sano grimaced and buried his face in Chi's T-shirt.

"Don't remind me!" he whined desperately. Almost every girl in class had a crush on either Tyson or Kai. It was just… plain wrong. Why couldn't they be attracted to boys their age? So what that his dads were really handsome and youthful and still had bodies to die for? Sano had made Tyson and Kai swear they'd never show up at another parent meeting. The mothers just… flipped out in their presence. The Japanese teen sighed, and Chi chuckled, running his fingers through the silky navy locks once.

"Cheer up," he murmured, "They're pretty into my dad as well." Sano gave him a murderous look, making the other flash his fangs quickly. It made a tremor run down Sano's spine. He leaned his head down, scooting a bit closer to his oldest friend. Exhaling deeply, Chi tightened his arm around the shorter teen's shoulders, squeezing gently. They stayed silent for a while. Chi soaked in every one of these moments when Sano fell silent from sheer fear of what was happening between them.

They had known each other always. Chi vaguely remembered the day uncle Tyson and Kai had come over with a bundle. He had no idea they'd be spending so much time together, him and that bundle, that became a small boy, then a big boy, and now… a young man. He remembered being annoyed and frustrated with the Japanese more often than he could count.

And now, he couldn't imagine being without him anymore.

Sano leaned his chin on Chi's collarbone, staring at his pretty face, a stupid grin on his lips. Chi frowned.

"You're hurting my collarbone," he stated. Sano flashed a sudden smirk.

"You're hurting my eyes," he murmured seductively. Chi cast a pleading look to the ceiling.

"Do you really expect me to fall for that?" he sighed. Sano puckered his lips and neared the other boy's mouth.

"Don't have to. You're already gone for me," he mumbled and pressed their lips together. Chi felt a spasm somewhere in his gut, let his eyes slide shut, and pressed gently in the kiss. Sano caressed the older boy's lips with his; kissing and nipping gently, an occasional lick here and there. His tongue slid inside the hot mouth, responding to the other's tongue sensually. Chi let out a low groan, and their mouths latched together tighter, Sano shifting his weight on the pink-haired male.

Their hands roamed over each other's bodies, stroking and squeezing the young, taut flesh over T-shirts and jeans. Head tilting, Sano deepened and hardened the kiss, Chi's hands rummaging up in the dark navy hair. He pulled, breaking the kiss abruptly.

"You didn't come here so you could do this all weekend?" he panted, slightly amused. Sano bit his flushed bottom lip, smirking.

"Nah. The way I pictured it, we'd be wearing a lot less clothes," he breathed, closing the distance between lips again. The surroundings blurred away as they melted together, hands sliding under shirts eagerly.

"Boys? You in there?" Sano's eyes shot open at the muffled voice. He rolled off the bed in panic.

"_Ummpff_!" He landed on the floor with a thud, holding his head. Chi bounced up sitting like a scared bunny. The door opened and Mariah came in, a laundry basket leaning against her hips.

"Hi sweethearts. Sano, what are you doing down there?" she asked, giving him a quizzical look. The Japanese started and begun gathering stuff from the floor in his lap, grinning at her insanely.

"Aheh, just cleaning up Chi's room a bit!" he laughed, a bit too loudly. Mariah lifted a pink brow, looking a tad concerned. Then she turned to her son, who was flustered and slightly sweaty.

"I'm doing laundry, you've got anything dark?" she asked. Chi shook his head quickly, shrugging.

"Here! I've got something!" Sano yelled. Mariah glanced at the single black sock he had found on the floor. He dropped it in the basket and grinned at her tensely.

"I knocked but nobody answered so I let myself in, hope you don't mind!" he babbled. Mariah shook her head once.

"Of course not. I was down in the basement. Lord, look at this place. It's like a nuclear bomb went off in here," she sighed, "Anyhow, I need you to bring back that blender we borrowed last week."

"Ok, Sano can take it with him when he goes home," Chi said. Mariah gave him a look.

"Oh no. You're taking it back tonight," she informed. The boys went pale and exchanged horrified looks.

"Tonight? But… why can't Sano just…" he stuttered.

"You are taking it to them now," Mariah interrupted, putting the gadget on his son's bed. Chi stared at it in horror.

"But…"

"But what?" Chi looked at Sano, who motioned for him to shut up. Mariah cocked a brow.

"But what, Chi?" she asked again, sharper. The Neko-jin boy sighed.

"Nothing…"

"My thoughts exactly. Why don't you get going right away, and remember to thank them," she said. Chi rolled his eyes.

"You borrowed it, why do I have to thank them?" he muttered.

"If I remember correctly, it was you who gulfed down 90 of the smoothie I made with it, sweetheart," she said. Sano grinned mischievously at the pink-haired teen who stood up stiffly.

"Ok, fine," he sighed, "We'll get going."

"Oh, how did the test go?" she asked matter-of-factly. Chi was putting his belt on.

"Fine, it went fine," he mumbled.

"Good. Don't forget to thank Tyson and Kai!" she said and turned to the door. Before closing it behind her, she smiled. Silly boys. Did they _really_ think she didn't know about the true nature of their relationship? Shaking her head, she went downstairs.

Once Sano and Chi made it out of the dojo, the older boy frowned.

"What were you doing in there?" he asked. Sano rolled his eyes.

"Duh, I don't want her to know I'm avoiding home because my dads are… eh… you know…" he muttered, blushing.

"Right. Let's take my bike," Chi said and walked to it. He opened the lock, and Sano sat behind him, frowning. He sighed and wrapped his arms around Chi's waist.

"You think there's some way we could slip the thing inside from a window or something? I just don't wanna go in. What if I see something?" he complained.

"Come on, we'll make sure they notice us," Chi reassured.

Five minutes later, the Hiwatari dojo came to view. Chi halted on the lawn and locked his bike while Sano went to the door. The shorter boy opened and ushered his friend in first.

"I'M HOME!" Sano yelled, glancing around suspiciously. They blinked and looked at each other. It was dead silent. Chi smiled.

"See? Maybe they went to some nice restaurant," he said. Sano seemed to cheer up and ran in the living room; it was empty. Chi put the blender on the kitchen table and followed him.

"Dad! I'm home!" Sano yelled. Silence. Grinning, he turned to the taller boy.

"Wow. They're really out. Who would've thought?" They looked into each other's eyes, and suddenly Sano's smile became seductive.

"We're all alone," he murmured, taking a step closer, "No parents to walk in… wanna come upstairs and see my post stamp collection?" Chi rolled his eyes, but leaned down for a kiss anyway. Sano took his hand and guided him up the stairs; casting lidded looks over his shoulder. He couldn't believe this. The house all to himself, and Chi here with him. And nowhere they had to be… Pulling the Chinese into a soft, deep kiss in front of the door, he smiled invitingly and turned to open it. They stepped inside and looked up.

Their jaws dropped in horror.

Their hearts stopped beating.

On the floor, a naked Kai was lying on his back. Sitting on top of him, was a naked Tyson, legs spread. They had headphones. Listening to something. And moving. Kai's hands on Tyson's waist were lifting him up and down, and the pony-tailed man's palms were on Kai's thighs. They rocked back and forth, eyes shut tightly, panting softly in rhythm with Kai's thrusts.

Sano gawked at the sight in horror. His eyes hurt. He tried to scream, but nothing but a wheeze came out. He hurled around and ran downstairs for his dear life. He just wanted to forget, forget, be blind! Chi gaped at the sight a second longer, a slight scarlet creeping on his cheeks. They were so… Chi's eyes widened at his own scary thoughts, and he rushed after his friend. _They're not my uncles, not really. They stopped babysitting me years ago! _He tried to calm himself down as he searched for the navy-haired teen with his gaze.

He saw the door was open and ran out. Sano was on his knees, hands over his eyes, wailing loudly.

"I'm bliiiind! God, if you have any love for me, smite me right now! I don't wanna live anymore! This is the end! The apocalypse! God, take me now! I want to die! Send your vultures to peck my eyes out; I don't want them anymore! My mind, my innocent mind! Ruined! Whyyy? Why…"

Chi smacked Sano in the back of his head, stopping the tantrum.

"Would you cut it out with the drama? Nobody died," he huffed. Sano sniffed and glared at him, rubbing his bump.

"My innocence did," he muttered. Chi lifted a brow.

"Your _what?_ Give me a break, you knew what they were doing," he said. Sano winced and slapped his hands on his ears.

"Stop it! I don't wanna think about it! Ty is innocent! Pure as first snow! Clean, squeaky clean! They only hug and kiss! Aaaahh!" he wailed. Chi sighed and shifted his weight.

"Well, if it's any consolation…" he started, but shut up quickly. Sano blinked and looked up.

"What?"

"Nevermind. I forgot you were adopted." Sano's brows forked at the hint his position as their child would be any less because of that.

"What? Chi, tell me!" he demanded. The Chinese boy flustered slightly, looking away.

"I was gonna say I finally realise where you inherited your firm, round ass from…" he trailed off, flashing his friend a grin. Sano paled, then went slightly green, then blushed furiously. He jumped up, hammering Chi's side and shoulder.

"DIE! DIEEE!" he screamed in outrage, but Chi couldn't help laughing uncontrollably, which only intensified the smaller boy's rage. As hard as he tried, Sano was still too short and young to beat his friend up, and Chi grabbed his wrists, grinning at the scowling boy.

"Come on, calm down. In a few weeks you won't even remember. There'll be lots of other problems; tests, homework, early mornings, vegetarian meals…" he said. Sano's breath was still uneven.

"How come you're not traumatised?" he grumbled suspiciously. Chi shrugged.

"I guess I haven't really seen them as relatives since I turned 10. If I was a kid, I'd probably freak out, but yeah, I don't really see them as uncles anymore, just your dads. Your really hot dads," he said. Sano's eyes darkened with outrage, and his mouth became a tight line.

"They're not hot!" he snapped, "They're… sweet, not hot!" Chi nodded quickly.

"Of course they're sweet, but c'mon, you know those girls at school aren't blind or stupid," he said, "You just have to accept the fact your dads are really hot and they'll be doing that for years to come." Sano winced as if being hit, and Chi pressed his head gently against his chest, stroking the dark blue hair gently. Sano sniffled softly against Chi's T-shirt, nuzzling it. Chi buried his face in Sano's hair.

"Guess we won't be getting it on tonight?" he chuckled. Sano scrunched his face.

"Never. Ever. I'm abstinent from now on. I'll become a monk," he grumbled. Smiling inwardly, Chi guided him to the bike. He'd come around.

_() Inside the Hiwatari dojo ()_

Tyson walked in the kitchen naked, whistling. He opened the fridge, patting his stomach rhythmically, observing the content on the shelves. Kai came in, also completely naked. He walked behind Tyson and slid his arms around the shorter man's lean, tanned waist. Tyson smiled wistfully and leaned into his partner, letting Kai nuzzle his neck seductively.

"What are you doing here?" the Russian mumbled, kissing the taut skin.

"I'm hungry," Tyson said. Kai crazed his teeth lightly over the neck, grinding his length between the firm, warm globes.

"I've got something for you to eat right here," he murmured huskily. Tyson grinned and slapped Kai's thigh.

"Kinko!" he muttered softly, "Seriously, though, I'm starving. Gotta refill my energy supplies." Something caught Tyson's eye on the kitchen desk.

"Hey, isn't that the blender we borrowed Rei and Mariah last week?" he asked. Kai stopped suckling on Tyson's earlobe and looked.

"Hnh. Must've dropped it off before going to the kid," he said. Tyson bit his lower lip.

"Hmm, I could use a protein shake," he mused. Kai grinded his hips harder into Tyson's, panting in his ear.

"Let's go back in the bedroom and you can have some of Mother Nature's very own protein shake," he whispered. Tyson laughed and squirmed playfully in Kai's grip.

"That's disgusting, you big perv…" he murmured, but not at all upset. He turned around and responded fervorously to his lover's kiss.

"We've gotta fix that CD player," Tyson panted, breaking off, "I don't wanna listen to our song on those dumb headphones, they get in the way…" Kai captured his lips again hungrily. Tyson broke off the kiss.

"I mean, we only need to listen to it once a year, so…"

"Do you _mind_?" Kai snapped, "This isn't exactly flattering…" Tyson blinked and blushed, kissing the slate-haired man quickly. He reached down and took Kai in a firm grip.

"This," he murmured huskily, "Is very flattering…" Kai let out a low breath against Tyson's lips, pressing him against the fridge.

"Bedroom. Now," he growled lowly. Tyson pushed him off gently, Kai's hand sliding down to squeeze his buttocks as he turned to open the fridge again.

"I really need to eat something… Oohh, Thai noodles!" he gasped and took the box out, smelling it.

"Fine," Kai said, pulling his arm, "Now to the bed." Tyson blinked and looked up, Kai pulling him out of the room.

"What? You always say we can't eat in bed," he reminded.

"You'll eat those off _me_," Kai informed shortly. Tyson blushed and grinned.

"Oh. Very well then, captain," he murmured. Kai halted at the age-old pet name and looked over his shoulder. Then he threw Tyson on the ground.

_Screw the bedroom_.

**The End**

**A/N:** Yes, in my mind Tyson and Kai are forever young and hot, like Goku and Vegeta lol… But they could be 35 in this, which is pretty young, you know. A lot of Hollywood sex symbols are older than that… Besides, Tyson does kendo and Kai goes to the gym, and they have lotsa sex to keep them fit, so there :P


End file.
